.... Then my oldest son went to school. My heart ached and longed to be with him, but I thought every kid has to go to school and Mom's just need to get over it. So, I tried to enjoy my other 2 kids at home while my oldest was at school. We had a great time, but, then he would come home and have sports and I thought, oh, but I want him to have time to play at home and to read to him. I tried the best I could while he was on break, but then of course he wasn't used to being at home anymore, so we had to go places all of the time and have playdates. I still kept on thinking, but when does he have time to play and just hang out with his siblings. But, I followed the norm, thinking this is what I had to do.
Then my second daughter went to school. I was so sad, and missed her so much, but thought, this is what I have to do right? Then she didn't want to go to school and she wanted to stay home. I longed to keep her at home and sometimes I did. But, then she was falling behind in school and she loved to color and her teacher said, " she takes too much time coloring, she needs to spend more time doing worksheets." Her teacher sent me home with packets telling me that she needed to do extra homework at night in order to stay caught up. I complied, an we did homework and dreaded every minute of it. This was all when my little girl was 6 years old.
Then, my 3 year old boy had speech delay and I took him to get tested. The school district said he didn't know his colors at 3, he couldn't talk and so he has to do 4 days a week preschool at the school. Remember, I wanted to teach my kids at least when they were little, but now, I had to keep them caught up in the system. I felt that I was being told if your kids aren't doing this and this by this age, they are going to fail in life. There isn't time for them to be kids, they have to stay caught up with everyone else. This didn't feel right to me, I felt there was so much more to childhood than drilling and homework and tests.
Finally, my oldest son came home crying from 3rd grade saying that his head hurt from being in the computer lab all day taking a weeks worth of tests, I said, " this is not what I want"..... so, " I said, we're not doing any of it anymore. We are going to come home all of us. My kids are going to learn to be together, we are going to spend time together as a family and I am going to teach my kids, not the school district, not some teacher that doesn't know them or care about them as much as I do. and I told my husband, which was the hardest thing in the world. Because I knew he considered it to be pretty strange, he didn't want our kids to be wierd. But, my heart and the Lord told me this is what I needed to do. My husband told me "I know you will be a great teacher to our kids." That gave me a lot of confidence, but now what to do.....
I have never done this before, I was worried how they were going to grow up and fit in with society and how was I going to teach them. They aren't very good at listening to me, and how do I do this? Well, I found great curriculums and tons of ideas, but really what I needed to know was how not what to do. I found "A Thomas Jefferson Education", by Oliver Demille and read it and loved it, but heard and read negative reviews and thought that's not for me. I still did not understand how to do this thing called homeschooling.
Then after my first year of homeschooling I was having a baby and in so much pain. I still did not understand how to do this, so called homeschooling, but I just felt this is what I must do, I could see the big picture and knew where I wanted to be, not how to get there.
So, in my second year of homeschooling I set out bound and determined to figure this out. How am I going to do this? I signed myself up for A Thomas Jefferson Education Facebook group to get ideas and tips from Moms who have homeschooled their kids and who have raised their kids to not only be educated, but whole individuals, kids who have strong testimonies, are hard workers, know how to socialize, have strong families and love to learn. This is what I discovered.... This book..... is the ultimate handbook for raising kids. It's not about homeschooling, but it's about research and a compilation of ideas and things that have helped families to raise successful children and it's not do this or else they won't turn out successful, or it's not homeschool them this way or they won't turn out great. It's about why our modern education system is failing and what we as parents can do to fix it in our homes whether we homeschool or not. I truly believe that if we follow our kids developmental patterns and listen to our kids and trust that the Lord knows what he needs of them we will be led to know what to do for them. I am so grateful for this book and for the things that it has helped me understand that I would never had understood if I had not decided to homeschool. The next few posts will be about ways that we have implemented "Leadership Education" in our home.
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