WHY WEAKNESSES???

I love this scripture,  it is one of my all time favorites.  I've been pondering a lot lately about weaknesses.  Sometimes, it seems that we can never get ahead because our weaknesses are dragging us down or (I should say "me").  But,  I've had some thoughts lately.

A while back a mentor that I look up to, posted on a facebook group that I belong to,  that we need to start with our strengths in order to address our weaknesses.  I loved this idea and decided that I was going to ponder and find my strengths.

My strengths that I found as I prayed were as follows:

1.  I love to read
2. I love to learn
3. I love wholesomeness
4.  I value and love my family
5.  I value childhood
6.  I value relationships
7.  I love music
8.  I love the gospel of Jesus Christ and have an unshakeable testimony of the Scriptures and Jesus Christ.

I thought,  wow,  I think I can share these strengths with my kids and others.  But,  sometimes my weaknesses creep up on me and make it very difficult to share my strengths.  So, I decided to use my strengths to overcome my weaknesses.  First,  I love to read.  So, I picked up a book that dealt with some things that I was struggling with. 

I love my kids,  and I truly believe that yelling at them or punishment gets me nowhere in our relationships.  I feel that having a strong connection with your kids surpasses any type of consequence or punishment that I could inflict upon my kids.  But,  sometimes,  it is so hard to get kids to do anything that I need them to do and I fall back into old habits.  Well,  this book and Dr. Laura Markham,  have completely changed me and my mentality.  She believes,  and has done tons of research and showed that when we build on our relationship then the kids will naturally listen to their parents out of love, rather than out of fear.

One of the first quotes from her book that I loved is as follows:

".. That's why your first responsibility in parenting is being mindful of your own inner state.  Mindfulness is the opposite of "losing" your temper.  Don't get me wrong-  mindfulness doesn't mean that you don't feel anger.  Being mindful means that you pay attention to what you're feeling, but don't act on it. (p.6)"

 

Well,  pretty much she is trying to tell us that if we don't take care of ourselves as parents,  then it is really hard to take care of our kids.  There is so much insight in this book. I wish I could just keep it in my memory.  I truly recommend this to every parent. 

 

I've also read another book lately by an educator that I love an admire named Charlotte Mason.  http://www.amazon.com/Habits-Mothers-Secret-Success-Charlotte/dp/1508401659

 

I loved this book,  because she says that anything that a child is failing to do is most likely because those habits haven't been instilled in the Mother or in the child.  If you want your child to have good habits, you must have good habits yourself.  If I want my child to build habits,  I need to be mindful of those habits and not let them go each time.  It doesn't mean I need to get mad at them,  it means that I need to gently remind them each time.  I am the queen of letting things go, so Charlotte Mason gave me renewed vigor.  She says that if we focus on too many habits at once that it can be overwhelming,  so we need to focus on one habit at a time until it becomes second nature.  It takes about 4-6 weeks to build a habit.  By the end of the year we will have about 12 new habits if we focus on one at a time, rather than a whole bunch of incomplete  habits.  Pretty amazing insight.

 

So, as you can see when I have weaknesses I am forced too lean on what I know and turn those weaknesses into strengths. 

 

Lastly, a few of my strengths are music and the gospel.  I found that music brings peace and harmony into our home and gets us moving, and I found that when I focus on reading my scriptures and having a daily devotional with my kids that our days are blessed.  Jesus Christ truly does make up for any weaknesses that we have and He will be there when we put Him first in our lives. 

 

I can truly see that Heavenly Father gave me weaknesses so that I can turn those weaknesses into strengths.  I once heard a quote that said that " We worked on our strengths before we came to earth,  now is the time to work on our weaknesses."  So, now I am renewed and feel that I am grateful for my weaknesses or else life would be so boring and pointless if all we had were strengths.